What a game!! What seemed like a for sure loss, Jean-Gabriel Pageau came out of nowhere and scored 4 goals, including the overtime winner!! The team picked Pageau up on to their shoulders and paraded him around the bowels of the CTC chanting "WE WANT CUP WE WANT CUP" After the boys took their shower, they got onto the bus for the sweet victory ride home. Just a quick thought though....do the players shower together? That would mean they see each other's balls? Weird...
As the bus got rolling, Pageau walked to the front and slipped the driver a $10. Suddenly, the bus did a quick 180 and headed in the opposite direction. "Hey? Barrhaven is that way. Where the FUCK are you going?" asked coach Guy Boucher. "Coach, gentleman....I am feeling lucky, so we are headed to the CASINO DU LAC LEAMY TO PLAY SOME CRIPS WOOOWEEEE" yelled Pageau. "You mean Craps. You want to play craps. Crips are a gang from California" said Mark Stone. "You're sick Mark Stone. Why would I play with pieces of poos?" exclaimed Pageau. "Listen guys, am I the only responsible one here??? We are professional athletes and we are in the middle of a playoff run. We need to go home and rest" said a defiant Guy Boucher. "Oh Guy SHUT THE FUCK UP" said a voice in the dark. Guy stood up stunned and yelled "WHO SAID THAT?!" A dark figure stood up in the shadows and stepped forward. It was Marc Crawford. "I did....the real coach of this team". Suddenly, Marc's transition lenses went from clear to black and he gave a quick whistle. Methot and Boro came up to Boucher from behind and chucked him directly out the bus window. "SEE YOU IN HELLLLLLLL" screamed Chris Phillips from the back. The bus went silent. Phillips took that way too far.
When the bus pulled up to the casino, Pageau stepped out in snake leather pants, no shirt, and a chain that would make 50 Cent blush. "Excusez-moi? You need a shirt to enter" said security. Pageau pulled out his bill clip and said "4 bottles of Dom Perignon and 6 extra large Pizza Pizza's". As the team entered the casino, the music immediately stopped. Standing in front of them was the entire New York Rangers team. They stared at each other for a bit, each waiting to see who would make the first move. Suddenly, Michael Jackson's Smooth Criminal started playing (DJ Zibanejad has been in a few standoffs in his time). Pageau's hips started to thrust and all of a sudden, both teams joined in the middle and did a choreographed dance. "ANNIE ARE YOU OKAY, ARE YOU OKAY ANNIE?" sang Mike Hoffman.
And then there was a loud bang and the music stopped again. It was the entire Boston Bruins team. Zdeno Chara stepped forward to challenge but his head hit the door frame and he was knocked unconscious. "SOMEBODY CALL 911" screamed Brad Marchand.
The night had spun out of control, and the police arrived and asked everyone to leave. As they were walking out, Freddy Claesson felt a quarter in his pocket and he goes "fuck it" and puts it in the nearest slot machine and pulls the handle. Lights and sirens start going off and buddy comes running "HOLY SWEET FUCK, YOU JUST WON THE GRAND PRIZE!!!"